Chronic Laziness or a Health Condition?
Do I have chronic laziness or a health condition? I am constantly fearful that I am seen as lazy, when in fact, I live with chronic migraine. Every day, I run a marathon and some days an iron man inside my body every day. I am a stay-at-home mom and I work HARD. I really think my job is one of the most under-respected jobs. Then again I used to be a teacher and got paid close to nothing to change children’s lives. So I’m used to it.
Chronic Laziness is really Fatigue
I am physically active all day. I carry a 25+ pound child on my hip while I do dishes, laundry, vacuum, cook, and clean. Then, I run errands constantly getting kids in and out of the car along with carrying a purse that might as well be called luggage. I do swim lessons, library classes, play dates, art projects, playgrounds, walks, and bike rides. All of this while in some sort of varying pain.
It’s exhausting. I will say over and over and over again that pain is exhausting. It’s depressing and exhausting but when I live with it every day and I just cope and keep on moving. I really don’t know any better. I am tired All…The..Time… My head pain makes me want to lay down constantly. My neck and shoulder pain are never relieved from the heavy lifting I do. But mostly it’s just this internal exhaustion of fighting. I’m don’t have chronic laziness, it’s fatigue!
Pain is Exhausting
My doctor once told me that my migraine attacks put my body into a fight or flight kind of state. When I’m higher than a 7 my body succumbs to the pain and it forces me to become completely consumed with it. My old self flies away and gives in. When I’m at a 2-7 I fight. I’m not lazy. I’m actually the opposite. I think a lot of people think of me as sitting on the couch eating bonbons and watching my soap opera because I stay at home. A form of laziness, right?!
Chronic laziness is just another misconception. When I ask for my husband to get me some water while I’m on the couch at the end of the day, I’m not lazy. I’m stopping the pain from rushing through me just because I’m going from laying down to standing up. He sits at a desk all day and I’ve walked up and down the stairs 100 times. He doesn’t see me as lazy, but why does society?
I lay in bed with a million things rushing through my mind at night and sometimes in the morning before the rest of my house has awakened. My job is never done, I don’t get to be lazy. Between the mental battle of teaching a toddler patience, calming a tantruming 3-year-old, and my fight with migraine, I’m not sure how anyone would see me as anything but a warrior. Just tack on more stigma for those of us living with migraine. Chronic Laziness? HA! I’m a fighter!!!
Reblogged this on authorjpsummers and commented:
I completely undetstand where you are coming from because I’ve heard the whole “must be nice to stay-at-home and watch soaps all day”
Trust me, I’ll gladly go back to working 40+ hrs as a personal banker where I am mentally drained instead of physically.
Great post!
You are anything but lazy! And anyone who thinks you are is insane! All that you mentioned is a lot for someone without chronic pain. You are definitely a warrior and a hero to your family.
Thank you!
Thanks for reblogging. People say really mindless things sometimes
You’re welcome :)!
Reblogged this on My Migraine Life.
OMG I am reading your “Lazy” entry and it is just like me. I fight through my pain everyday. Some days it’s worse than others and that’s when I hit a brick wall. It’s funny you mention the 7/10 pain constitutes “that’s it no more!!!” I am just like you. Once I get to a 7/10 pain I’m going to puke or I can no longer survive the day. I too am a SAHM with PTO, carpool, softball, drums but on the weekends. I’m a super nurse working 12 hour shifts Sat and Sun. I don’t want pity but I am sooooo glad I am not the only one that has these feelings. My prayers and good mojo goes out to you!
Thanks for your comment Amy! I’m sorry you suffer like I do but it’s nice we can give each other comfort & support. It’s a hard thing to understand.